This Pregnancy

I am 37 weeks pregnant with baby #4 and thought I should document a bit more about how the later end of this pregnancy has gone.

I don't know if it is because this is baby number four, or all the crazy things we have had happen recently but this pregnancy has been harder than I thought it would be. Dan and I are so blessed with the family we have and feel humbled by the faith the Lord has in us to send us another special spirit. It has just been a blesssing and a challenge, from which I've learned a lot.

Physically:
I felt pretty good after the morning sickness stopped in February. Then once Tess broke her leg in March I started having other symptoms that weren't so fun; pre-term contractions, lots of braxton-hicks,  more pressure and discomfort in my lower back, and other uncomfortable things. I have finally finished the long saga of my 3 implants, needless to say that brought stress and pain since my dentists couldn't get my lower left gums numb. And then some feet problems. But, the hardest symptom this time around was developing restless leg syndrome.  It is super annoying and makes sleeping next to impossible (combined with my large belly and athletic baby girl kicking around!) It has made me more tired than I have every been. Aren't these the days I am suppose to be resting up and reserving my energy. HA! There isn't any medication a pregnant women can take for restless leg. However, I've learned that sugar and caffeine make it a lot worse. I have tried to deal with my headaches with just tylenol and lots of water rather than a diet coke. I love eating ice!!!! Late afternoon and evenings I have to be careful how much sugar I eat. I toss and turn throughout the night.  I get up some nights every hour to stretch as well as go to the bathroom. (As I type this it is midnight, I wen to bed at 10, tossed and turned and still am constantly stretching/moving my legs.) My OBGYN says it will go away once the baby is born. So grateful for that knowledge!

Even though I lost so much weight to begin with I gained it all back quickly and got larger faster. I get all kinds of comments about how big I look and have for awhile now. For the most part I can just laugh it off.  This past week Jake and Tess commented on how funny I walk and how large my belly is. My sweet Tess simply made the observation that I look like a penguin when I walk. Gratefully, I am a small person naturally so carrying around an extra 30lbs just ain't easy.

Life is complicated
Dan has stayed super busy with work this year so far with at least 1 business trip a month if not two. That on top of his church work keeps him always on the go. We decided at the beginning of this year that we would be moving. We just don't feel settled renting and want to feel like we are progressing and giving the kids more.  So in all of our spare time, aka his late nights, we try to work out where and how to afford moving. Meeting with relators, driving past real-estate, putting offers in on homes, and trying to move forward and progress has added a lot of stress. Add the day to day business of homeschooling Tess, potty-training Abby, cleaning and keeping the family fed and as happy is possible...
Life is exhausting and complicated, but good!

Ready or Not
I feel like I haven't been able to really focus on and prepare for this baby like I would like to or have in the past. I was putting it all off: pulling out all the baby stuff, organizing, naming her, mentally preparing for labor/delivery/nursing, ect. until the very end. And now that it is here I don't have the energy to do any of it and it seems so overwhelming.

That All Said
Recently seeing Dan in the hospital for his appendectomy I realized how grateful I am to have a beautiful miracle to cuddle, love on and keep me company when I have to stay in the hospital!

I read a poem recently that I absolutely loved and expresses how I truly do feel about being a Mom...

Pittypat and Tippytoe

All day long they come and go--
Pittypat and Tippytoe;
Footprints up and down the hall,
Playthings scattered on the floor,
Finger-marks along the wall,
Tell-tale smudges on the door--
By these presents you shall know
Pittypat and Tippytoe
How they riot at their play!
And a dozen times a day
In they troop, demanding bread--
Only buttered bread will do,
And the butter must be spread
Inches thick with sugar too!
And I never can say, "No,
Pittypat and Tippytoe!"
Sometimes there are griefs to soothe,
Sometimes ruffled brows to smooth;
For (I much regret to say)
Tippytoe and Pittypat
Sometimes interrupt their play
With an internecine spat;
Fie, for shame! to quarrel so--
Pittypat and Tippytoe!
Oh the thousand worrying things
Every day recurrent brings!
Hands to scrub and hair to brush,
Search for playthings gone amiss,
Many a wee complaint to hush,
Many a little bump to kiss;
Life seems one vain, fleeting show
To Pittypat and Tippytoe!
And when day is at an end,
There are little duds to mend;
Little frocks are strangely torn,
Little shoes great holes reveal,
Little hose, but one day worn,
Rudely yawn at toe and heel!
Who but you could work such woe,
Pittypat and Tippytoe!
But when comes this thought to me:
"Some there are that childless be,"
Stealing to their little beds,
With a love I cannot speak,
Tenderly I stroke their heads---
Fondly kiss each velvet cheek.
God help those who do not know
A Pittypat or Tippytoe!
On the floor and down the hall,
Rudely smutched upon the wall,
There are proofs in every kind
Of the havoc they have wrought,
And upon my heart you'd find
Just such trade-marks, if you sought; Oh, how glad I am 'tis so, Pittypat and Tippytoe!

By Eugene Field